Saturday, July 31, 2010

Not MY Wedding…

 

I’ve never been one to think about my wedding day. In fact, I avoid thinking of marriage because it kind of freaks me out. Today, however, I discovered just how I DON’T want my wedding to be:

 

I don’t want my wedding to be in a back yard.

 

       I don’t want to be close enough to smell the other inhabitants of this property, such as horses, peacocks, or any other choice farm animals.

 

I don’t want guests to be able to park their vehicle no more than twenty yards from the ceremony. I don’t want them to then walk through the freshly plowed dirt, adjusting their oversized belt buckles and cowboy hats/mullets.

   clip_image002   I also hope that I do not have to be rushed to the hospital, leaving all my guests roasting in the sun for six hours.

 

I do not wish the path to my wedding to be marked with a makeshift clip_image004sign that was made with little to no knowledge of the English language. 

 

 

    Just for the sake of upholding some essence of class, I hope to not have guests throwing water at other, much older guests. This is not OK.

…She can come.clip_image006

 

All I know is that my wedding will be in a temple, and it will not have any of this atrocity. So if you are a future invitee to my wedding, please leave your hats, mullets, and misguided offspring at home.

Monday, July 19, 2010

Hard Things

Sometimes, we have to do hard things. Today,
<-- this little woman and myself did a beastly work out. On the way home, I thought, 'wow, I feel like jell-o'. And for some reason, that made me remember the conversation we had last night about how my father needs to exercise.

Now this father of mine, as most of you know, is still pretty weak because of his illness. Yes, that illness. The three month long ride of terror. That was a hard thing. -Here's something you should know about this man: If you ask him to help mow the lawn, he plants trees (or manages the planting of trees...). If you ask for some help on the computer, he just might build you a website. If you can make him get up and do something, he'll most likely get carried away. So of course when he got sick, he didn't get the flu, or the common cold; he had to take it to the extreme like everything else. He's such a Holman.

The point is, Dad needed to do a hard thing and go on a walk. When I got home, I caught him trying to go back to bed. The next 15 - 30 minutes was spent trying to find his shoes and repeating his doctor's words to him. "You need to exercise. No more sitting at the computer all day. Don't make me call your mother." -Ok so maybe the doctor only pulled the 'mother' card when she happened to be in the room, but all the same..

Finally, he got up, and instead of going on a walk, we found ourselves on a hike. And you thought I wasn't serious about his getting carried away...

We made it this far.

Then, since we both felt like jello, we decided to celebrate our progress
with a little of this.


and maybe a little of this.


There's only one thing that could be harder than making my father exercise today.

Getting him to go tomorrow. Wish me luck!

Friday, July 16, 2010

Follow the Leader

Ok. I did it. I started a blog. I've actually had it set up for a while now, but I didn't know how in the world to start it. I now realize, that if I don't just start it, it will forever be blank.

It is, at the moment, creeping towards two o' clock in the morn. That's the first thing anybody reading this should know about me. I don't sleep much. That means you can expect many of my posts to appear during the wee hours of the morning. I ask that you forgive any spelling/grammar errors that may occur. Because they probably will.

Mallory, -one of the founders of my desire to conform to blogging- told me to start with 10 unique facts about myself.
I've had over 24 hours to think about it, so lets see if I can get to 10, yeah?

1. I have large arms. I think it unique that people think it's OK to say to me, "OMG you're huge!" I like it a lot.

2. My father almost died. Twice.

3. As I said before... Insomniac.

4- sometimes, I like to annoy people just for the fun of it. So this here 'inconsistent formatting' is for you, Mal. :)

5. I work at a self serve yogurt shop. I stare at Panda Express all day and wish I could eat it. I also thought I saw the white version of Obama at work today. I almost asked him if I should deduct the tax.

6. My friends love it when I start talking about anything that even sounds like politics. <-And that would be my sarcasm at work.

7. I was a cheerleader. I even have a teddy bear that reminds me when I step on him. He was a gift.

8. I spent the majority of my Sr year driving a car that had zero handles on the inside. But there's more: my window didn't exactly work every time I wanted it to. I may or may not have gotten stuck inside on occasion.

9. I can't make my hair curl.

10. I have the attention span of Dory from Finding Nemo. School is fun. ...

Well there she be! Hope you enjoyed the read. One day I'll learn how to make this thang look nice.